Airlines unveil innovative new seating classes
First, airlines slimmed seats to add more rows but, finding this still
inadequate to generate the rider volume favored by management, they have
initiated inventive new passenger arrangements suited to any budget. Here is a preview of a few of the new passenger classes set to roll out in 2014-2015.
For the passenger who finds staying seated an exercise in discomfort on
a non-stop five-hour flight, Free Range seating offers an alternative, with
non-assigned seating that allows a full range of movement. This benefits circulation, and an
increase in riders by 45%. It also
makes flying an interactive experience as seating is limited to those who can
grab one when the music stops.
Hutch class, pioneered by Southwest and now standard on most domestic
flights, brings a new meaning to creature comforts in a contemporary
face-to-face traveling arrangement.
Floor grating above a gentle, sweet smelling bed of locally farmed
alfalfa hay makes those awkward trips to the restroom a thing of the past.
Passengers who value privacy will delight in these individual,
face-forward, single flier compartments.
A luxuriously appointed stall prevents fliers from leaning,
dozing or otherwise bothering their fellows by holding them safely in
place. Food and drink carts? No problem! A rotating feeder chute moves meals and beverages along at a
steady pace throughout the flight, often increasing the passenger’s BMI by 30%
by the time they reach their destination.
It’s win-win in these nutrition-conscious times.
Lambing Shed
Lambing Shed seating affords ample room for families |
The lambing shed concept delivers passengers to their respective
sections via a long, singlewide chute.
Once there, they are afforded more legroom, a place to recline, and
ample room for their often-noisy offspring. On a full flight, this can seem cramped, but for those who
don’t survive the flight they can become a delightful, gourmet repast for First
Class diners.
Brood Box class uses a bee-keeping model for getting the most passengers
into the smallest amount of space.
Passengers lie supine for the duration of the flight in a slimmed down
MRI-style compartment designed with the “red eye” flier in mind. Music, nitrous oxide, tubal nutrition
and catheters make the hours pass like—hours.
As part of a growing movement to lower airlines’ labor-intensive overhead, flight attendants have been replaced with Border Collies, who lead passengers to their seating, keep them in order, and provide constant attention. These collies are dedicated employees who will work long hours doing what they love without suffering the indignities of human help, who require layovers, time off, vacations, and benefits.
As U.S. Airways noted, the implementation of these new passenger perks inaugurates
“a new golden age of air travel.”
Is brood class downstairs with the luggage or did you forget the bonus bonus class? Great article Pachinko.
ReplyDeleteIs brood class downstairs with the luggage or did you forget the bonus bonus class? Great article Pachinko.
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